MERRY CHRISTMAS to all Frit readers.

The picture shows the Christmas dinner Frit has prepared by way of making sure no vegetarians or Mussulmanics turn up to share his table.

Wealthy lawmakers

How typical to see that 27 of the 50 richest members of Congress are nice, moral, considerate, progressive, selfless Democrats whilst the remaining 23 are selfish grasping immoral, evil and soulless capitalist Republicans. Ketchup Kid Kerry, the nicest, most moral, considerate, progressive and selfless Democrat of all being the wealthiest one of all.

This blog is now putting its feet up for a week, during which time it intends washing its mouth out and returning as an anti-Israel blog by way of extending its readership and attracting more advertisers.

Allah likes bad breath

In the month of Ramadan, over at “Islam Question and Answer”, the Mussulmancis are avoiding questions like “Does slaughtering your fellow human beings during Ramadan invalidate the fast?”, and concentrating, instead, on matters such as the “Ruling on eye drops for one who is fasting”, “Does looking at women invalidate the fast?” and the closely related “Does masturbation at night during Ramadan invalidate the fast?”. Then there is the question of dealing with bad breath during Ramadan, to which the considered answer is:

“Instead of using an aerosol when fasting, it is enough to use the siwaak (a stick) which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) encouraged us to use. If he uses an aerosol and nothing from it reaches his throat, then that is o.k. But it should be noted that the smell that comes from the fasting person’s mouth as a result of the fast is not something to be disliked, because it is the effect of obedience to Allah. In the hadeeth it says that the smell from the fasting person’s mouth is better in the sight of Allah than the fragrance of musk.”

The pie, pictured, is what the average Mussulmanic consumes between dusk and dawn every night during Ramadan. It contains no pork.

Secret weapon

How unexpected of the Pakistani press to ignore US efforts at providing aid and instead concentrate on spreading rumors that the US deliberately caused the current floods with its new secret weather weapon, HAARP (High-tech American Armament for Ruining Pakistan).

Mexicans just don't count

Is it true that 6,982 Afghastlystani civilians have been killed since 2006 (most of whom were killed by insurgent forces) whilst 1,510 coalition military people have been killed there since 2006, making a total of about 8,500 souls?
Is it at the same time true that 28,000 Mexicans have been killed in the drug wars since 2006? Frit is now encouraging Mexicans to change their religion if they wish to heighten their profile in the media and benefit from some sympathy, concern and western aid.

Olympics 2012

How amusing, gratifying and satisfying that the Mussulmanics are “angry” and “insulted” because the 2012 London Olympic Games have been scheduled during the holy season of Ramadan! Doubly amusing when one considers how low Britain is prepared to stoop to ingratiate itself with the Religion of Peace. What a faux pas! The nation is now in a panic and is “working with the Muslim Council of Great Britain to find ways to accommodate Ramadan during the London Games”.
Frit’s suggestion is that the Mussulmanics should hold their own all-Mussulmanic Olympics in the Mussulmanic country of their choice at any time of year they bloody well want. They can call it the Muslimpics. They can exclude women from all events. They can even include novel games like distance shoe throwing, competitive beheading and dismembering, honor killing hurdles, Jew jumping and the ever popular race to be first to breed with your closest relative.

The picture shows two members of the hopeful Moroccan all-girls ostrich chasing team whose shorts show a little too much ankle for Frit’s taste.

Dress code

Heard the one about the Mussulmanic stripper who's suing the nightclub owner for not allowing her to wear a full burka during performances? It will happen. It will happen.

Dishonorable talking cadaver for hire

Nice to know that, true to untruthful form, ex-unelected Prime Minster of the UK Boredom Brown, who, in April of this year told the gullible and the young that “Sarah and I might do charity or voluntary work, I don't want to do business or anything else. I just want to do something good“, has just signed up to the “speaking engagements” scam from which his predecessor, Blair, has made so many millions since leaving office. Frit supposes his new career will go well as he’s such a fascinating, charismatic, spontaneous and humorous man.
Another of his truth-challenged pronouncements earlier in the year was "I think you learn lessons all the time, and I'm always prepared to learn lessons, and always prepared to admit that if you made a mistake you've got to say that things can be done better." Notice the way the sentence begins with “I” in the smarmy philosophical part but quickly changes to “you” in the need for action part. How Brownlike.

Meanwhile, Frit learns that the two women who recently attempted to board a flight out of Britain with a deceased relative in a wheelchair wearing sunglasses, claiming he was asleep, thought they could get away with it because nobody stopped them back when they brought Brown into the country by the same method years ago.
The members of the audience at the first of Brown's speaking engagements, pictured, look as if they went to sleep when in actual fact they all died.

More cycling offences

Frit learns that two members of the Iranian cycling team are in all sorts of trouble for having celebrated something by publicly opening a bottle of champagne and spraying it around, just like the decadent sports kuffar does. Frit, whose gorge rises every time he witnesses a decadent sports kuffar performing this idiotic act nonetheless defends that moronic individual’s absurd right so to do. Frit also notes that Seyyed Ahmad ‘Alam al-Hoda, conservative cleric and Friday prayer leader in the city of Mashhad, Iran, voiced strong criticism over the participation of women in cycling competitions. He stressed that Islamic religious law categorically prohibits women from taking part in that kind of sport, and that broadcasting women’s cycling competitions on television offends the values of Iranian society, which, as he put it, must serve as a shining example of Islamic society. Maybe, once they’ve succeeded in inventing that long hoped for modest burka-bike for girls, things will change.

Education

Frit is pleased to see that the Pakistani press is looking into the state of Mussulmanic education. They are finding things like “In 57 Muslim countries there are only 500 universities currently, while, in the U.S. alone, there are 5,758 universities”. And things like “There is not a single Muslim educational institute which could be compared with Harvard, Cambridge, or Oxford” and “Arab countries spend billions of dollars on their defense but their expenditure on education is relatively very low”.

Encouraging! Trouble is, the apparent reason for all this is diagnosed with things like “Colonization and the subsequent implantation of the eastern educational system further uprooted the Muslim mind from its spiritual, intellectual, and historical ground”. And the remedy for it all is, of course: “The entire system of education has to be redesigned on the basis of the Koran and the Sunnah”! In other words on the same old basis of banging your head on a book 'till it bleeds.

Pale medicine

Frit is interested to learn that witchdoctors in Tanzania are willing to pay around 400 million Tanzanian shillings (around 250,000 dollars) for a Kenyan albino, who they will then butcher so they can boil up the body parts to make lucrative potions they can sell to the stupid. A Kenyan man has just been imprisoned for having abducted a Kenyan albino and having tried to sell him across the border. In the belief that this might be a good chance to rid the White House of its present incumbent, Frit has written to a couple of Tanzanian witchdoctors informing them that that individual is almost certainly Kenyan and certainly a lot less than black. At least we’d get some money for his otherwise worthless ass.

A perfect match

Frit notes that Google is advertising “1 million + muslims” for marriage on this very site and inviting people to find their “perfect match”. Presumably this means the one you are most closely related to.

Victims of warming

Having learned that a heat wave in Gaza has already resulted in several explosions and deaths due to improperly stored explosives becoming too volatile, Frit has written to the governments of the USA and all the EU countries to urge them to cut their emissions further and to cough up sums of money huge enough to provide the Gazans with some proper suitable explosives storage facilities. We simply can’t have them blowing themselves to pieces before they have time to make a home movie and shout Allahu Akbar.

Swimming in publicity

The Multimillionaire White Mohammedan Nobel Laureate Joker President, the biggest recipient of donations from despicable and demonized BP (though nobody seems eager to report this fact) and a man who would never, never use his family for publicity purposes under any circumstances, used his youngest daughter, Sasha, 9, in a staged publicity stunt but a couple of days ago. The apparent aim was to promote tourism in the oil stricken gulf area by taking her into the water and drowning her then bringing her ashore to prove there was no oil in her lungs. The plan only went awry when the ocean quickly washed the two of them ashore having had enough of slick in recent times. It also thought the two of them might start building a mosque in its depths. As can be seen from this photograph of the event, although only nine years old, Sasha’s appearance is already giving rise to rumors about her true parentage.

Thick people

Iranian government minister Rahimi has railed against various countries supporting UN sanctions against Tehran, calling Australians “a bunch of cow herders” and saying South Koreans should be “smacked in the face until they become human”. He said: “England has nothing. Its inhabitants are not human, its officials are not responsible, and it doesn’t even have any natural resources. They are a bunch of thick people ruled by a mafia. They have plundered the world in the last 500 years and the young lad in charge now is even more stupid than his predecessor”. Frit takes issue with this because, although Camaroon might be stupid, nobody, nobody, could be more stupid than his predecessor.

Apart from this, the stupidity statistics concerning the population of Britain or any other western country are of course being greatly bumped up by the inbreeding-related stupidity quotient of Mussulmanic immigrants. In Pakistan, 70 percent of all marriages are between first cousins (so-called “consanguinity”) and in Turkey the figure is between 25-30 percent. Statistical research on Arabic countries shows that up to 34 percent of all marriages in Algiers are consanguine (blood related), 46 percent in Bahrain, 33 percent in Egypt, 80 percent in Nubia (southern area in Egypt), 60 percent in Iraq, 64 percent in Jordan, 64 percent in Kuwait, 42 percent in Lebanon, 48 percent in Libya, 47 percent in Mauritania, 54 percent in Qatar, 67 percent in Saudi Arabia, 63 percent in Sudan, 40 percent in Syria, 39 percent in Tunisia, 54 percent in the United Arabic Emirates and 45 percent in Yemen (Reproductive Health Journal, 2009 (Consanguinity and reproductive health among Arabs.).

This increasing stupidity of the populations in Mussulmanic countries is, of course, not helped by their stubborn refusal to add to their gene pool by breeding with non-Mussulmanics, and is evident from: “The lack of interest in science and human development in the Muslim World is also clear in the UN Arab Human Development Reports (AHDR). AHDR concludes that there have been fewer books translated into Arabic in the last thousand years than the amount of books translated in Spain, for instance, every year”.

Experts like Frit predict that, if the Mussulmanics continue to insist on keeping their blood pure in this way they will posses but one single gene between them in 100 years. The Pakistani soldiers pictured, for instance, all look so alike because they are virtually already all the same person.

Ramadan comes round again

Ramadan is here again and being conscientiously shoved down our throats by the manipulative multiculti media and, as the picture shows, by big business, because, like any other mass event, Ramadan is a commercial event. But Frit is having trouble understanding quite why taxpayers in western countries should be asked to fork out large sums of money to provide Pakistani flood victims with food in the month of Ramadan when they are not supposed to eat any anyway. Ah, but, of course, they are only obliged to fast in the day and are allowed to pig out at night all they want. Not a lot different to the normal human pattern of fasting at night and eating in the day then, really. Why bother, Mahmood, why bother?

Behind the times no more

Frit notes that the Mussulmanics are dissatisfied with the concept of the Greenwich Meridian because it is a loathsome creation of the kuffar, and, as everybody knows, Mussulmanics invented time long before anybody else. Thus they have built themselves a huge clock in Mecca to set their own watches by from now on. Quite why it has to look like both Big Ben and the Empire State Building combined nobody is saying. Frit believes the workings inside it are based on the workings of a cuckoo clock, not because a bird pops out of it but because you have to be cuckoo to swallow the bizarre rationale of the wonderful Mussulmanic science behind it, which states that Mecca has a greater claim to being the prime meridian because it is "in perfect alignment with magnetic north”! The claim that the holy city is a "zero magnetism zone" is supported by Mussulmanic ‘scientists’ like Abdel-Baset al-Sayyed, of the Egyptian National Research Centre, who says that there is no magnetic force in Mecca! "That's why if someone travels to Mecca or lives there, he lives longer, is healthier and is less affected by the earth's gravity," says he.

Excitement

Frit reads that a groom accidentally killed three relatives, i.e. his father and two aunts, and injured a further eight, at his wedding in Turkey recently when he fired an assault rifle in celebration not quite into the air, unintentionally raking the guests with bullets. Just think what he could have achieved had he been permitted, by Allah, to have a couple of beers first! Frit is devastated to learn that the Islamic supremacist who now rules that country, determined to drag it back into the 6th century, was not invited to the event.

Beware of all who would believe a thing rather than know a thing

Fit notes that, after having been encouraged by those who currently rule the USA to “feel good about their historic contribution to science”, the Mussulmanics have decided to make yet another important research contribution by developing the world’s first modest cycle for women! However did we get along without it? Also, the Iranians have just announced that they intend building the world’s first nuclear fusion reactor, a feat that has eluded the stupid kuffar for many a year. This must be because the backward approach of the stupid kuffar is to base his science on knowledge; whereas the superior Mussulmanic’s approach is to base his science on belief. Inch’Allah.

Closely related meat pies

The British are horrified to learn that they’ve all been troughing milk and meat products derived from ABOMINABLE CLONED ANIMALS unawares! Yuk! Curiously, you can stuff your gullet with chips made of cloned potatoes and wash them down with wine made from grapes cloned for more than 2 millennia etc., but the cheap meat pie is the only item on the plate requiring appropriate ethical scrutiny and hysteria. The clamor over the issue is so universal that one could think them all clones.

Chalk wharf

Frit notes that hectomillionairess Chelsea Clinton just got married. Apparently, the name “Chelsea”, meaning “chalk wharf”, was decided upon by the parents in preference to “Tower Hamlets”, another London borough. The groom, thank goodness, is not the Kenyan farmer who offered Hillary 40 goats and 20 cows for the hand of her daughter some time ago because the Clintons rarely deal in figures followed by fewer than six noughts in connection with livestock or anything else. Instead, she wisely wed a wealthy banking Jew with big Democratic Party ties. The wedding was kept strictly private, perhaps in an attempt to conceal the fact of the groom’s religion (not his family politics) from the wonderful Arab world. Thus not a single one of the trash on the backs of whom the Clintons have achieved such fabulous wealth and prestige was invited, and rightly so. Nor was the press there, the tool through which that trash has been so well milked on the Clinton’s behalf for so long. All we know about the affair is that the wedding cake was gluten-free! Frit, who, despite all the security, managed to slip in through the catflap, took this photograph of the bride proudly showing off her wedding gown.

Independence

Frit notes that the Turkish Ministry of Foreign Affairs said recently that, in its considered opinion, the latest decision of the International Court of Justice concerning the wonderful legality of Kosovo's independence should be considered as “a new window of opportunity for establishing peace, stability and cooperation in the Balkans”. Frit also notes that the Prime Minister of Turkey recently said that Kurdish rebels who seek autonomy from Turkey will “drown in their own blood”.

Temporary marriage

Frits notes that, in Persia, a country so protective of the virtue of its women that it cuts off the breasts of mannequins in shop windows, the authorities in the Province of the Quds’eh-Razavi of Khorassan have thoughtfully “created centers for temporary marriage” just next door to the shrine of the eighth Imam, Imam Reza, in order to “elevate the spiritual atmosphere, create proper psychological conditions and tranquility of mind” for “brothers” on pilgrimage who are “far away from their spouses”. Thus they are advertising for “sisters” between the ages of 12 and 35. The wages are:

5 hour temporary marriage – 50,000 Tomans ($50 US)
One day temporary marriage – 75,000 Tomans ($75 US)
Two day temporary marriage – 100,000 Tomans ($100 US)
Three day temporary marriage – 150,000 Tomans ($150 US)
Between 4 and 10 day temporary marriage – 300,000 Tomans ($300 US)
Sisters who are virgins receive a bonus of 100,000 Tomans ($100 US)

Strange how they convert all the figures given in their own idiotic currency into the currency of the evil empire. Frit is unable to work out why interested sisters should need to accompany their applications with “two full-length photographs” of themselves “fully hijabed and properly veiled”! The reason they are “obligated to donate 5% of their earnings to the Shrine of Imam Reza”, on the other hand, is easier to grasp. That’s what pimps do.
Frit feels sure that anyone reading the advertisement who might be shocked that, in this day and age, public authorities in a country about to obtain nuclear weapons should be offering 12 year old “sisters” jobs in the temporary marriages sector will be suitably reassured by the advertisement’s footnote – “Attention: sisters below 14 years of age require the written consent of their father or male guardian.”

Imam Reza, pictured suspiciously close to some animals, apparently based his claim to being Mohammed’s successor on the “Hadith of the pond of Khumm” as well as on the “Hadith of the two weighty things”!

More vindication for warmers

Yet another expensive enquiry in the UK has cleared the Climategate scientists of fudging their data. Good job, as some of the poor dears have in the meantime considered suicide and some have received death threats. Apparently, one of the methods suggested for both was chaining to stakes on Spitsbergen and daubing with seal oil so as to combine the event with a chance to count just how many polar bears are still around.

The picture shows the Climatic research unit at the Socialist University of East Anglia, Norwich, Norfolk, where the data in question was acquired from some old thermometers left lying about on top of the canteen radiator. Built of blocks of ice to give it that politically correct, iglooey, eskimoey, indigenous ethnic victimization look, the building is in danger of melting and causing global floods if the funding dries up.

Surprise of the century

Kosovo's declaration of independence from Serbia in 2008 was not illegal under international law, top UN judges have decided. The Multimillionaire White Mohammedan Nobel Laureate Joker President intended backing Kosovo’s independence even if the court decided it was illegal, he made a point of saying. Could have been a terrible irreconcilable conflict there but it turned out all right in the end. Frit took this photograph of one of the impartial low-paid top UN judges concerned.

Getting what others pay for

Frit learns that Ex-Prime Minister of Australia, Kevin Rudd, is currently being considered for a big job at the United Nations. Frit supposes this has nothing to do with the 500 million Australian dollars Rudd is said to have given away to sponger/warmer nations whilst in office. Although, were Frit ever to become Prime Minister of Australia and were he to say “you must be joking” to sponger/warmer nations when they requested him to tax Australians and give the proceeds to them, Frit suspects he would never be offered a job at the United Nations later on. Never in a million years. Never, never, never.

Free yourselves!

http://www.muslimsdebate.com/search_result.php?news_id=4399

Taliban loses head

It seems a Gurkha soldier in the British army, under heavy fire, cut off the head of a dead Taliban commander and took it back to HQ for identification purposes rather than the whole corpse. Now he is in all kinds of trouble because the Afghaslystanis are OFFENDED by the act. Presumably the offence is because
a) the individual was already dead, instead of alive, when his head was cut off
b) the knife used was sharp instead of blunt
c) no crowd of hysterical onlookers was around to shout Allahu Akbar
d) no cameras were there to make any fond home movies

The picture shows part of the "Tower Of Skulls" built in Niš in 1809 by the Turks from the skulls of 1000 Serbs beheaded in a beheading ceremony to the above strict Mussulmanic specifications. UNESCO is currently considering awarding “cultural heritage” status to this monument.

Trojan Horse

“We await the day when Turkey joins the European Union to serve as a Trojan horse.” Gaddafi Duck.

Hair of the Prophet

Learning that the Iranian authorities have banned barbers from offering western style haircuts to men, Frit has written to all western governments suggesting we retaliate by banning Muslim style throatcuts. Barbers have also been banned from plucking hairs from the faces of clients to give them the appearance of having two separate eyebrows rather like the horrid infidel they would all so like to be. The picture shows the ultimate in Chic Shiite Schönheit: short, mad, short back and sides, monobrow, the white man’s suit but not his tie.

Srebrenica, 15 years on

“The goal of the Islamic revolution in our country is the creation of a unified Islamic state comprising the area of Bosnia-Herzegovina, Sandzak, and Kosovo. Jihad should be pursued to its final outcome in order to exterminate the enemy and the infidels. We should not wait for a challenge or a provocation. Muslims must invent a challenge. They must be the ones who produce the challenge, and the goal will then come by itself…Muslims must be superior to all others, and every effort should be made to create an environment in which everyone will be of pure Muslim blood.” Hasan Čengić, former Deputy Prime Minister and Defense Minister of the Federation of Bosnia and Herzegovina.

The picture shows the slick hectomillionaire spiv who allied the US with the speaker of these words.

Spain 1, Holland 0

The World Cup final was a game made boring by the referee and watched by communist polygamist Jacob Zuma who has more children than there were people in the stadium. In fact, a recent census revealed that most people in South Africa are either married to Zuma or were fathered by him. For most of the match he looked like a man wondering why the players were kicking a ball around on the pitch instead of throwing spears at each other. He was also probably wondering if the “10 cattle” he paid for Swazi Princess Sebentile Dlamini in 2002 might have been a few cattle too many. Jacob Gedleyihlekisa Zuma, such a modern leader.

The Arab in the photograph can be seen asking Zuma how many humans he’s prepared to pay him for his cow of a wife.

Great Gore warms up by strange means

Is it true that a female masseuse is accusing Great Gore of having behaved like a “crazed sex poodle” when she gave him a massage (for around 500 dollars earned feeding eyewash to the gullible and young) in his hotel room and he insistently demanded extra favors? And is it true that some Gore supporters have said not to tell anybody because if it gets around the “world’s going to be destroyed by global warming”? Frit turned up this photograph of Gore all dressed up and ready for a massage. His ex-wife, Kipper, says she never used to mind him dressing this way in the bedroom as long as it helped his low emissions problem.

Judge watch

To his horror, Frit learns that, this week, five criminal defendants in Britain who were charged with breaking into an arms factory and destroying property valued at some $285,000 were found by a jury to be innocent of all charges. They were found innocent despite the fact that all five admitted to having committed the crime, because they said they did it to stop the factory providing arms to Israelis who would use them to commit war crimes against Palestinians. In his summing up, Judge George Bathurst-Norman suggested to the jury that “you may well think that hell on earth would not be an understatement of what the Gazans suffered in that time”.

Incensed, Frit had his people find out where Judge Bathurst-Norman lives, went to his house, broke in and trashed his collection of law books, booze and kefiyas. When he appears in court he will be pleading he did it in order to prevent Britain from sinking even further into absurdity and institutionalized anti-Semitism destined ultimately to cost the lives of many Jews, and he will expect to be found innocent.

Historic contributions

To Frit’s complete astonishment, the boss of NASA has appeared on TV to confess that, when the Multimillionaire White Mohammedan Nobel Laureate Joker President appointed him to that position he charged him “foremostly” with finding “a way to reach out to the Muslim world and engage much more with predominantly Muslim nations to help them feel good about their historic contribution to science, math, and engineering”!!!

Frit believes the most significant of these historic contributions was the invention of the halfwheel. These were once produced in large numbers in the Middle East but ended up as decorative elements on the tops of church towers as they gave such a notoriously bumpy ride. Later on, a Christian hit on the idea of nailing two of them together and a Jew added some spokes, but these were mere minor modifications. The basic concept came, as always, from Abdul and his Prophet, and we thank them for it. Without Abdul and his Prophet we’d still be living in the trees.

The face on the prairie

For some time now, sharp entrepreneurs have been making good money using Google Earth to trawl the highways and byways spotting gold watches and other items of lost property, and Frit considers himself a pioneer in the sector. Recently, when looking for any valuables lying about in the eastern part of Oklahoma, Frit came across the miraculous image shown. Etched into the countryside by the hand of God, it could be the face of Christ or even the face of the Multimillionaire White Mohammedan Nobel Laureate Joker President. What’s the difference? Frit believes he is the first to have discovered the image and that it has even more commercial potential than the crummy Nun Bun and the Oskar fish with “Allah” written on one side and “Mohammed” on the other combined. Frit has already obtained an adjacent lot for a very modest price where he intends erecting “Frit’s Four Star Okie Face Palace of Pilgrimage and Wellness Tower Hotel”. The higher the room in the tower the higher the price and the better the view of the miraculous image and the associated healing effects. With this project, Frit feels himself onto a true winner at last.

Human doner kebab speaks out for HAMAS

Curious to see that Erdogan, the supremacist who rules Turkey, a man as cheap and greasy as his own national dish that looks like dog meat on a spit, and probably is, is demanding an apology from Israel over the terrorist flotilla episode. This is the leader of a country with one of the bloodiest histories and one of the worst human rights records of all time. Even today, Kurds in Turkey are still forbidden to give their children Kurdish names, Frit reads.

Curious also to notice that Erdogan, such an avid follower of Prophet Mohammed, who hated dogs, should go to all the trouble of featuring the word “dog” so prominently right in the middle of his own name. And, equally curious that, despite his HAMAS friends being similarly true adherents of the Prophet and thus forbidden to have anything to do with any part of a pig, they should choose a name that so obviously starts off with the word “HAM”. But then the name of the Prophet himself, irrespective of the various spellings (i.e. Muhammad, Muhammed, Mohammed etc.), always appears stubbornly constructed around its own substantial and quite centrally placed pork content.

Neigh

Frit finds it strange that a man caught on Google Street View cameras standing at the side of the road wearing a horse mask causes such a furore whilst this big horse standing in a field further down the road wearing a human head raises not a comment.

Gaza Ahoy! (again)

This week, Frit is busy delivering aid to Gaza. He has chartered this vessel stacked up with assorted guns, ammo, explosives and rockets packed in cases labelled “Medical supplies”. The rest of the words on the labels, i.e. “will be urgently needed once Hamas gets its hands on all this stuff” have been crossed out. The vessel is crewed by three dozen Hezbollah storm troopers one of whom claims he knows the words to Kumbaya. Amazingly, this project has the full backing of every single government of every single country in the world! The Multimillionaire White Mohammedan Nobel Laureate Joker President is so impressed he even invited Frit to the White House for dinner. Frit courteously declined because, when he eats goat, he prefers not to sit on the floor and eat it with his hands.

Unluckily, Frit’s people ran out of room to write “Aid Ship” on the stern and, due to time pressure, arrived at a less than optimum abbreviation.

More offence

Further to yesterday’s post, Frit has reported this tree to the authorities in Tehran, requesting it be properly cleaned up before it corrupts us all and causes earthquakes.

Offensive suckling

Frit notes that the Afghastlystanis are offended at having been called “backward” by a British minister. He also notes that the US authorities condemned the recent “Everybody draw Mohammed Day” as offensive. Meanwhile, the Saudi Arabian authorities have absolutely failed to respond to Frit’s letter demanding they, in turn, condemn things that are truly offensive to him and to all other enlightened human beings living in the 21st century, such as the debate currently going on in that country as to the pros and cons of having working women breastfeed their male colleagues as a way of making it acceptable for them to work together in the same building!!

The Mussulmanniquins pictured here in a shop window in Tehran, however, will thankfully never be asked to accommodate their male counterparts in that way as the religious police have sawn off their offensive breasts. ISLAM = Infantile Shiites Loath Ample Mammeries.

In black and white

Further to yesterday’s post, Frit has now obtained this rare photograph of the mountain in question taken pre-Mandela.

The victimisation World Cup

Frit has just returned from South Africa where he spent a few days looking for white folk. This is because the intense media coverage of that country during the current World Cup was giving him the impression there are no longer any whites left there. Frit is aware that whites are being culled in large numbers in the Rainbow Nation right now without the media giving it a mention, so he wondered if they had already been wiped out in totality. Happily, Frit is able to report that this is not the case, there are indeed some whites still hanging around in the bush down there, patiently waiting their turn to be hacked to pieces in their beds. But as their faces fail to fit the desired narrative, media cameras are simply leaving them out. Mystery solved.

Whilst there, Frit took this photograph of one of the biggest but least reported pieces of environmental vandalism of all time. It seems the first thing Nelson Mandela did upon assuming office was to order the pointy part of this mountain sawn off and thrown into the ocean for no other reason than it attracted snow and, as we all know, snow is the same colour as the Boer.

On going down

“Israel is our first line of defence in a turbulent region that is constantly at risk of descending into chaos; a region vital to our energy security owing to our overdependence on Middle Eastern oil; a region that forms the front line in the fight against extremism. If Israel goes down, we all go down.

To defend Israel’s right to exist in peace, within secure borders, requires a degree of moral and strategic clarity that too often seems to have disappeared in Europe. The United States shows worrying signs of heading in the same direction.

The West is going through a period of confusion over the shape of the world’s future. To a great extent, this confusion is caused by a kind of masochistic self-doubt over our own identity; by the rule of political correctness; by a multiculturalism that forces us to our knees before others; and by a secularism which, irony of ironies, blinds us even when we are confronted by jihadis promoting the most fanatical incarnation of their faith. To abandon Israel to its fate, at this moment of all moments, would merely serve to illustrate how far we have sunk and how inexorable our decline now appears.”

Jose Maria Aznar

Catholic church gets it right, then conveniently wrong again

In a document presented by Pope Benedict, the Christian Bishops state that, in recent decades, the percentage of Christians in the Middle East has fallen from 20 percent of the population to less than 5 percent, and the number is dropping. Despite the fact that the bishops believe this is “principally because Muslims make no distinction between religion and politics, thereby relegating Christians to the precarious position of being considered noncitizens, despite the fact that they were citizens of their countries long before the rise of Islam”, they somehow still manage to conclude the whole thing is due to the “unrest” in that region caused by the Israelis, the very same people who cause everything bad everywhere, including Frit having fallen down at the weekend and injured his knee.

Frit took this photograph of the Pope sucking up to some Mussulmanic bigwigs on a recent visit to Mecca.

Great Gore ditches Kipper (or other way round)

So, in reality, the famous kiss was about as warm as the famous warming. What a surprise.

Israeli Defense Force lets us down

The Israeli military, normally quite efficient, had hundreds of anti-Semitic Mussulmanic terrorist supporters, warmongers, international communist dross, aging agents provocateurs and assorted vile victimization vermin at its mercy on ships yesterday morning but could only manage to bag a mere handful. Let us all hope for better results next time.

Moonstruck

Frit experienced an encounter with a ninety-three-year-old lady at the weekend busy travelling around the country entirely alone. He was very impressed by her fitness, independence and mental agility until she then informed him that “the weather will never improve until they stop going to the moon”. Frit thanked her and promised to pass the information on to Al Gore.

Back trouble can even affect the divine

Frit is not one to gloat over the misfortunes of others so, today, he must severely reproach himself for his deep lack of distress concerning “social activist” and pop trash icon Bono who is currently in hospital having injured himself on stage whilst preparing to further corrupt and fleece the gullible and the young on a world tour. Apparently, Bono, who wears dark glasses for everything but looking in the mirror, tripped over his own opinion of himself in the dark. Frit believes this individual opted for the name “Bono” as an alternative to the full version, i.e. “bonobo”, as he deemed the full version a bit too lifestyle-suggestive even for the pop sewer milieu.

Frit took this photograph of aging Bono taking time off from social activism to behave like a bonobo with some teenage girls.

Environmental catastrophe

Once upon a time, when Frit was dabbling in the property sector, he and Mrs Frit inspected a rural property with a stream flowing through its ample grounds. Next to this stream Frit noticed an apple tree in a non-upright condition, its six inch diameter trunk having obviously been gnawed clean through by an animal. “BEAVER”, cried Frit and Mrs Frit simultaneously, looking round for a weapon and scarpering as fast as they could from the addled property owners intent on telling them all about why everyone should want a beaver in their garden.

In Frit’s world, beavers are truly accomplished environmental delinquents meriting severe control rather than protection. Thus he nods his head wisely when reading that the Polish authorities believe the antics of beavers to have been a factor in contributing to that country’s current major floods, which have claimed 15 lives and caused untold destruction. In Frit’s view, Polish beaver botherers should now either be arrested or have their feet nailed to the riverbank and their legs painted brown.