Exceptional Methodist able to carry on good work, relief all round

Frit notes that Lord Fatmed of Rotherham, Methodist peer, has already been released from jail by appeal court judges after serving just 16 days for a texting whilst driving murder. The judges deemed Lord Fatmed’s case “exceptional”! But there is “not one law for the rich and powerful and one law for the rest”, explained appeal court judge Lady Justice Hallett. She made no mention of any laws that might apply to the rest but not to Methodists. She then amazingly went on to warn motorists they face jail for texting while driving, unless they are just texting “Allahu Akbar” which is considered too short a message to cause an accident or do any sort of harm in the world at all.

Apparently, the few days he spent in jail will now be stricken from the record. There will no longer be any evidence of it, so he can carry on with his “international humanitarian work” which his lawyers argued would be in serious jeopardy if a prison record remained on file. So that’s okay then.

The picture shows the texting murderer in question, right, leaving the prison by the back door, disguised as a harpy, in the company of his solicitor. He obviously lost some weight over the past sixteen days but is planning to put it back on again as soon as he can get his mincers into some flavoursome halal lard.