Thursday, 11 June 2009

Tedious unelected money printer comes to grief on Obama Beach

People are saying that unelected Prime Minister of the United Kingdom Boredom Brown, the first ever holder of that office to allow his cabinet ministers to appoint themselves as long as they keep him on as leader, suffered one of his irritating and deeply unattractive spasms of the mouthparts right in the middle of his recent D-Day speech, causing him to make a painfully revealing Freudian slip – “Obama Beach” instead of “Omaha Beach”. They say Obama Beach is the beautiful place where, in his fantasies, Brown and his not so brown hero skip along in the sunshine together, hand in hand, with bare torsos and equal popularity figures, off into the bright new socialist-Islamist future where there is no recession and no expense accounts and where even the one-eyed are considered equal.

However, after careful analysis of the actual tape using voice analysis software, Frit is convinced this was no slip of the tongue at all. Instead, Brown was thinking of the recent episode when Michele Obama was in London and refused to sit next to him at dinner in case his glass eye fell out onto her plate. Brown is still vexed about this issue and is known to mumble about it under his breath, in Scottish, all the time. Thus his words were not about paying tribute “next to Obama Beach” at all, but rather about not having been allowed to sit “next to that Obama bitch”.